NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been give five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end in "fine".

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of "nothing".)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A women is thanking you. Do not question, or faint; just say you're welcome. I want to add in a clause here: This is true unless she says "Thanks a lot" - That is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say "you're welcome" in this case, that will bring on "whatever".

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying "Screw YOU!"

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a women has asked a man to do several times, but is now doing herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response, refer to #3.